An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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