your room smells of hookers.
And success
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
