Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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