i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
