I can tuck mytits in my pants
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
its liver damage thursday
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
