i always forget guys have bellybuttons
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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