i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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