Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
