I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I'm having to shit out rocks
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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