no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Randomize
