You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Randomize
