she was so not down for the gang bang
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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