Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
