i permit you to call me
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
