People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
