hell yes lets make some ravioli
I puked a lego.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Randomize
