As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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