I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.