Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.