I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
