He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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