Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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