Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
And then he peed in my hair
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