I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
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bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
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Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
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I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
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