You can't special order awesome
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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