Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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