I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
