We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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