The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Randomize
