It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
