Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
