something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
