i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Randomize
