He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
