Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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