You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
