Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Randomize
