Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I have surprise drugs for everyone
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
