i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I need to calm my uterus...
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
