Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
He's a Shit stain on my heart
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
