so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
