SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
last night I used snow as a chaser
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
