she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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