All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
if i died would you start the facebook group?
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
