Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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