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• (708): View more from Illinois

  you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend

  (1-708): View more from Illinois

  why?

  (708): View more from Illinois

  so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.

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• (507): View more from Minnesota

  The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."

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• 

  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.

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• 

  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (360): View more from Washington

  You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.

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• (906): View more from Michigan

  Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome

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