hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
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Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.