Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (424): View more from California

  I'd wear matching sweaters with you

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  (424): I'd wear matching sweaters with you http://tfl.nu/xbhf
  Replies (3) Good night (2090) Bad night (1141)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...

  (703): View more from Virginia

  oh

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  (248): So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine... (703): oh http://tfl.nu/2rig
  Replies (10) Good night (786) Bad night (3097)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.

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  (612): I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks. http://tfl.nu/pli4
  Replies (27) Good night (3970) Bad night (931)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.

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  (816): if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin. http://tfl.nu/cu5c
  Replies (83) Good night (4590) Bad night (663)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?

  (1-814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.

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  (814): Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight? (1-814): I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me. http://tfl.nu/ovto
  Replies (25) Good night (4715) Bad night (864)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!

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  (813): for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?! http://tfl.nu/r22y
  Replies (51) Good night (6712) Bad night (832)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...

  (316): View more from Kansas

  Just the budget?

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  (515): I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget... (316): Just the budget? http://tfl.nu/v45e
  Replies (4) Good night (4426) Bad night (943)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.

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  (704): I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with. http://tfl.nu/hnbu
  Replies (4) Good night (1090) Bad night (2500)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch

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  (419): His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch http://tfl.nu/wbxj
  Replies (13) Good night (4118) Bad night (1441)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.

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  (520): I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people. http://tfl.nu/38n6
  Replies (6) Good night (653) Bad night (1140)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned

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  (210): He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned http://tfl.nu/rsut
  Replies (13) Good night (1722) Bad night (702)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.

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  (757): Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today. http://tfl.nu/c0a7
  Replies (7) Good night (601) Bad night (1566)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.

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  (704): Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom. (615): My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you. http://tfl.nu/pnfc
  Replies (3) Good night (799) Bad night (282)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.

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  (801): You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age. http://tfl.nu/6o7l
  Replies (3) Good night (762) Bad night (230)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.

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  (570): I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies. http://tfl.nu/z52h
  Replies (3) Good night (766) Bad night (252)

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