Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
