I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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