Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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