Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no