I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
you are never too drunk for berry picking
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
